So, it's the christmas season, as you all very well know, and this would be the reason for my lack of updates, which I apologize sincerely for. before I get into my rant on christmas, and my explinaton of my love of it, I need to make a few very neccesary apologies. In the last blog I wrote, I understand some things were misinerpreted, and were surely taken in such a way that they should not have been. Also, I need to apologize to some one I generalized in a group, there's something very wrong about the way I mentioned them
First of all, I owe an apology to the efigy of Aphrodite that I have been blessed with. She's Julianna, as you may have guessed, and I know I upset her with something I wrote, and how I worded it in a previous post. The word replaced was used, in some sense, and it was taken in the wrong context. My choice of words was such on account of the way on referred to our relationship. They told me I had replaced Elizabeth with Julianna, and I was trying to show this person just how wrong they were be using their own terms in what I thought was a light favoring Julianna. For anyone who did misinerpret it, I hope you see this. I love her, Julianna, with more heart than most could know. It brings chills to my mind to tell her I love her, her beauty, her art, her voice, and her ever peircing and knowing eyes. If our relationship was a ''rebound'' as some have deemed it, she would have seen through such a facade, as many others would have. She is more to me than that, she makes me happy, in every moment I spend with her, perpetually am I jovial and content, if not overjoyed while she is in my presence. I am graced, and blessed, to have her choose some one such as me, and to have her give me a chance to explain what she read and was wrongly considering.
The second apology goes to Jessica McCormick. In the last post I generalized JEESH and their actions, however Jessica played no part in it. She is pure of soul and intention and still remains very true to the friendship she pledged to me in the past. I owe her more than she could know, her insights have seen me through many a peril. It is a sin if she had read the last post. I fear I may never apology rightfully enough if she had. If any think wrongly of her, do not, for she is a blessing in herself, and any friend of hers is extremely lucky.
Now, I may digress and explain christmas, as it is viewed by me, your humble narrator. To me, this time, the time spent amoung family and friends is irreplacable, however working as I did through the break I found some trepidation in the exploitation that some sought in it. It was a terrible thing to see how people were thrashing and cursing in my grocery store at such a joyous time, and it pained me to see the lonesome expressions shared on some of the faces of my peers. I wished to bring such happiness to all those around me, however the ability to do so eluded me far too often, and I apologize for not being capable enough.
My family is bonding more than ever now, and I see the stress acting as a prelude to this time is the reason they were angry with me, and I apologize for the hurtful words said about them, they had all the right to think irrationally, even quickly to my malignant actions. I thank them very much for the tolerance they showed me. My father is putting a step forward in relating with me, standing in my defence, taking part in my jokes, showing more of the semblence mentioned in an earlier blog. I wish I would have gotten him the cook book I had planned on, it would have been something we could've taken part in together, however many occasions still rest for me to share in this experience with him.
I saw many of my relatives, and found to love them even more than ever. I believe I am transitioning far into maturity at this point, I admired my gifts more than ever, and thought it extravagent and mindless that so many people should spend so much money on. I would hope they saw the same joy in my gifts to them. To give, had more gravity than ever as well. This year may have been my metaphorical coming of age, and I hope this is true.
To all of you who read, I wish you a merry christmas, and I hope that you understand my apology, for I am truly and sincerely sorry for this pain. Julianna, if you do read this. I love you, and I hope you understand where I faltered. It means more to me than you could know that we resolved this..
-Your humble narrator